Make the Dessertiest Dessert Ever – (Eight Layer Bars)

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Have you seen all of those crazy desserts lately where you layer two desserts together and bake them with cookies smooshed inside?

Well, now. I had seen enough of those to get my crusty old cogs turning in my noggin, and I was inspired to create the tallest, most packed dessert I could come up with that would still be edible and easy to make. All just because instead of extreme sports, I am into extreme stupidity.

But holy yum. And holy yuck at the same time- honestly you need to take the smallest piece of this or you will projectile vomit at your crayon transfer prints that you just made and hung up all over your house.

Here are the ingredients I used in this decadent, bubble-butt-making treat. And then I will tell you which ingredient you shouldn’t use.

ingredients for crazy dessert

Ingredients:

  • 2 packages Toll House refrigerated cookie dough (the kind that is perforated in squares)
  • 1 package Oreos (we used Spring Oreos with nasty bright yellow cream)
  • 1 bag mini Nutter Butters
  • Pretzels
  • Ghirardelli brownie mix (we used dark chocolate, of course)
  • Blue frosting
  • M&M’s

Do you see where this is going? Nowhere good. Here’s a Vine I took while assembling it. If you wish to hear my lovely voice, click on the vine and click the volume on in the top left corner. I have a falsetto that’s to die for.

And here’s how you make it:

1. Preheat your oven to 350. Lightly spray your pan with cooking spray. I used a 2.75 quart Pyrex baking dish. Take a swig of whiskey.

2. Jam in your first layer of cookie dough. This is fun, and I hope you have music blaring.

cookie dough - layer one of crazy dessert

3. Layer in mini Nutter Butters, and then pretzels over those. I think next time I might use smaller pretzels for more salty crunchy goodness.

nutterbutters pretzellayer

4. Mix up your brownie batter as directed on the box and pour it all over as the next layer. I got all cute and added 1/2 cup of Rice Krispies to the brownie batter, but they got soggy and I think just absorbed right into the batter so I highly unrecommend them. Maybe you could add marijuana instead.

browniebatter

brownie layer in crazy dessert

5. Do a little Oreo jig and place them on next, followed by your second layer of cookie dough. I had to slap out pieces of the dough flat between my hands and lay them gently over the cookies.

oreo layer

cookie dough top layer

I can’t remember exactly how long I baked this, because I took it out after 25 minutes thinking it was done, and then when I cut into it it was goo. So then I put it back in for maybe a total of 15 more minutes. Put foil over the top of the cookie dough after it browns (the first 25 minutes or so), because you don’t want that layer to BURN.

While you’re waiting, make some food sculptures.

food sculpture • Tiny Rotten Peanuts

You won’t be able to let it cool all the way before you eat it, and you will burn your tongue on the brownie part, but then after it’s cool, add frosting and M&M’s.

ultimate layered dessert from Tiny Rotten Peanuts

Here is your diagram:

dessertcrosssection1

Here is your next visual. I recommend printing this out in poster size to hang on your wall:

Eight Layer Dessert from Tiny Rotten Peanuts

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4 Comments

  1. 03/29/2014 / 9:15 am

    Oh this makes my teeth hurt. And my stomach. I want to eat the whole thing.

    • 03/29/2014 / 9:30 am

      If you made this and ate the whole thing, I would send you a shiny new nickel and also? I would start a wall of fame on my blog with ONLY YOUR NAME on it.

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